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So I’m watching CNBC today for no reason and there are three idiots talking about and laughing over how stupid Steve Ballmer and Microsoft are for not releasing Vista right now! I laughed at how incredibly uninformed these rich “experts” were. Conservatives love to spend all your time convincing you they are the smartest SOB you’ll ever meet. But truth is, they’re usually loons, and in my experience, always wrong.

     

How do I know? Name me one thing that has gone right over the past six years. 9-11, Katrina, Harriet Myers/Sammy Alito/John Roberts — all wackos; the Dubai Port Deal, skyrocketing gas prices, shrinking wages for working people, staggering debt, unending wars, prescription drug donut coverage for old folks, astronomical foreign debt, outsourcing, open borders, contempt for the opinion of the American people, the war on science, media manipulation, faith-based initiatives, a deliberate attack on our fundamental freedoms — BushCo has run the most arrogant and incompetent administration in any America’s history.

No wonder Wall Street follows Washington’s lead when analyzing software companies.

And then I see these three investment jokers on CNBC telling America that Microsoft is dumb to delay Vista any further; that they should release it now so the company can make billions and the stock will rise and they will make more money. No matter that people won’t buy or abide an expensive, buggy, operating system! No matter that it would hurt Microsoft’s business and future for years to come! No matter that it makes sense for Microsoft to take their time and get it right before final release. Jeebus fucking H. christ. Watch for these same fools to be on TV in six months telling us how wise it was for Microsoft to get Vista right before releasing it. They know you won’t remember what they said.

Bullshit is what came out today when Web 2.0 service advocates claim that in the name of synchronicity, your next hard drive will be online. Web 2.0 (another name for “shit we can continually charge you for online rather than sell you once for you PC”). But there are several limitations never mentioned.

   

First, this is for the business crowd who house large data on their own servers back at the BAC — big-assed corporation. An online HD would not really be an online HD; e.g., it won’t include an OS (yet) that will boot your computer. Second, an online HD would not be feasible for large amounts of data. I collect lots of porn and photos. No online HD is going to store my terabyte-sized porn collection and no broadband is wide enough to transfer it. (My ISP only allows me a piddling 128k upload speed, like most other stingy ISPs.). You may collect music or movies, both of which quickly eat up disk space. Finally, I will never ever trust another company, entity, or person with my data. I have documents and data that date back more than 20 years now. And these jackasses want me to transmit that to their servers and feel safe in that? Anyone paying attention to the nutcase conservatives in the US know that they are obsessed with spying on people — in their homes, businesses, their medical records, their financial records, on the phone, and especially on the computer. So the issue of personal security will never allow this to go far, or as far as online HD advocates want it to.

In the end, money once again explains this story. Right now, 95% of Web 2.0 ideas are about extracting money from your pocket on a monthly basis for things that are free now if you do them yourself, such as backup and synchronize your own data. The fat fuckers on Wall Street are salivating at the bullshit being sold to them as Web 2.0. Sure some services — even backup solutions — are sensible options. But they want to create entire companies that will be mini-googles. Ain’t gonna happen.

Synchronizing RSS feeds and email is quite different than online storage. The next billionaire will be the coder who creates a simple synchronization tool anyone can use through their own domain. Note the word simple. Still, HDs are becoming smaller, cheaper, faster, and provide far more capacity than ever, with terabyte drives coming as soon as 2007. Hard drive portability, modularity, and mobility are easier than spending three weeks uploading data, and it solves the problem of privacy. You don’t want to see my porn, and I don’t want you (or some government agency) to see it. And for that matter, I don’t want you to see the letter I wrote to Grandma last week either.

While watching the World Cup Germany 2006, I came to a revelation late in life that will bring me bliss for the rest of my days. Bet against my team. That Germany clinched a win over Portugal Saturday was not because the German team kicked ass up and down the field all day and Bastian Schweinsteiger was damn amazing. Germany won because of me.

Let me explain.

You see, I’m 44 and have spent this life working low wage jobs and those that weren’t were simply insufferable and as a result, I either quit or often got fired. More unfortunate, however, is my terrible luck with sports teams. Only twice in my life has a team I was cheering for won the championship. The rest of the time, my team loses. I know nothing of football except that the World Cup is bigger than any American sport by a hundredfold, bigger than the Olympics, and that the sport is quickly addictive — the more you learn, the more you appreciate, the more you want to watch. Trust me, for an American who has never played “soccer,” that’s enlightenment.

       

But since I wanted Germany and England to play in the final, I knew that somehow, neither would make it despite having formidable teams this year. When England lost to Portugal, I was so in a “WTF mate?” mood. So I decided to play an experiment. Since whatever team I’m cheering for inevitably loses, I’ll bet against my favorite team. If my team wins — Germany over Portugal on Saturday, then I’m happy because my team won. But if my experience holds true and Germany had lost, I would have won 4.4-to-1 odds against them and pulled in a nice lump of change, thus making me happy!

My wagering has nothing to do with logic, whim, emotion, odds, recent performance, past history, or even superior players. It’s all in my own desires. I wanted the St. Louis Cardinals to win the World Series in 2004? They get blown out in four straight games. I wanted the Dallas Mavericks to win the NBA Championship (and up 2-0 over Miami)? They lose four straight and go down in flames. I wanted the Seattle Seahawks to win over the Pittsburgh Steelers in the NFL Super Bowl? The referees blow a series of calls and Pittsburgh easily wins. Somehow, my team always loses. As a kid, I wanted a big sister with big tits? I got stuck with a first-class asshole for a big brother.

So from now on, no matter what happens and who wins, I will be happy. I will bet against whomever I want to win, and either be blissful that my team won, or I will suffer my favorite team’s loss by collecting money on a sports bet that I can use to buy my next computer. With my unfortunate luck, I figure I can retire by the time I hit 50.

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Another major study finds that the more obese a woman is, the greater her risk for coronary heart disease, hypertension, diabetes, high blood pressure and death.

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